Angel's Secrets

Fanfiction Archive

Muse-ic for Connor

By Monica V. Martinez

Summary: A muse is sent to Connor by TPTB to inspire him to have a better realtionship with his father.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, the characters aren't mine, blah, blah, blah. Please don't sue.
Feedback: please write to me and tell me what you think. SparklinGlitr822ATaol.com


It'd been months since his father had kicked him out of the hotel. It was December and Connor didn't know if it was the Christmas festivities or the cold that made him want to go back to the hotel. It was the cold he finally decided.

He was actually surprised his father hadn't invited him back yet. After all he had saved Cordelia's life several times. Well that was before she ran back into his father's arms.

Deep down Connor knew that once she got her memory back she'd go back to him but it still hurt. He missed her. She was beautiful. And he thought he was in love with her. That was until she ran out on him like everyone else in his life had.

Connor decided to stop feeling sorry for himself. He gathered his equipment and went to his perch. He'd found a building right by the Hyperion Hotel that he could sit at and see into Cordy's room.

When he arrived his dad was in the room with her. He was jealous. How could a demon like his father ever really love anyone? Although Cordelia Chase's beauty was enough to make anyone love her.

"They are a lovely couple aren't they?" said a feminine voice behind him. It alarmed him. He hadn't heard the stranger arrive. Cautiously Connor turned around to face the woman. She was exquisite. "I must admit I am jealous you watch her so. How can such a lowly woman hold on to such a man like your father," said the woman.

She was standing outside in the cold December air in a mere nightgown. It was sheer and black and looked like something out of a Victoria's Secret's catalog. "Or how can such a beast hold on to a beauty like Cordelia Chase," she said. She sprinted towards him. He thought she was going to fight him but instead she jumped off the roof.

Connor tried to catch her but then saw she didn't need saving. She had jumped off the five story building and landed on her feet as if nothing. All Connor could bring himself to say was, "wow." He turned to the only person he knew could help him.

"What were you doing watching me?" Cordelia asked the boy. "That's not the point. She knew you and me and she knew dad ... I mean Angel. She wasn't human," Connor said. "You know not being human isn't bad," Cordy said being half demon herself. He gave her a look and she knew not to push it.

"Hey Cord," Angel interrupted. Then noticed that his son was with Cordelia. "Hello son," Angel said to Connor who just glared at him. He went back to his main point. "Cordy, um I got the movies that um you wanted and the stuff. Why are you here Connor?" Angel inquired. Cordy answered against Connor's wishes; "There's some chick in black stalking him or you or me or all three of us. But she's not exactly human. Unless humans can jump off a building and land on their feet?"

Angel gathered up the gang and began researching. Connor was regretting coming back. While the office was busy with work. Connor wandered around the lobby. He walked over to a large Christmas tree. Cordy said from behind him, "It's beautiful huh? Gunn picked it out. Fred and I decorated it. Well except for that one little angel over there your dad put that one up himself." Connor picked up the angel. It was sparkling crystal, about the size of his palm. The angel was playing a trumpet. There was a scroll coming down from the trumpet that held a picture of a baby. Under the picture it read: BABY'S FIRST CHRISTMAS- Connor Angel. Cordelia left and gave him a moment.

"Gorgeous, is it not?" the girl in black asked. This time Connor spun around quickly. So quickly that he dropped the angel. With the fastest reflexes he's ever seen she caught it. "Oh you mustn't break it or father will be angry with you," she scolded. "Who, What are you?" Connor asked.

Angel heard all the noise in the lobby and ran in. At his presence the girl became startled and she ran into Connor's arms. She regained some composer. "The Vampire with a soul shall rise up and conquer in the name of evil. Unless the hire doth triumph," she said. "Huh?" Angel and Connor asked at the same time. The girl fainted.

An hour or so passed and the girl awoke. Connor had not left her side. "You came for me didn't you?" he asked. She nodded. Angel walked in. This time she didn't get scared. "You're a muse. You inspire people. You know poets musicians, warriors," Angel told her.

"I am a battle muse. I give great warriors the strength and inspiration to fight. I was sent to Connor. I am his," she said, "A great battle will arise and good must conquer. Only the son of two evils can bring about good." "Once again with the huh?" Angel said. "Two wrongs do not make correct. This time they do. Darla evil, Angelus evil. Baby son Connor, good," she said.

"So Connor will save the world," Fred asked the muse. "The battle may not be with others. It may come from with in. But he must be inspired by goodness," the muse answered, "for what is in his soul will fill the earth." Connor sat silently by her side. "Connor," Angel spoke to his son, "I'd really like it if you and your muse would stay at the hotel."

"Knock, knock," Cordy said, "I brought some blankets and things for you." "Thanks," Connor said half-heartedly. "We did some research. She is who she says she is," Cordy informed the troubled boy. "My dad, I mean Angel is the champion. He's the one who is in all the prophecies not me. Why send me the muse lady?" Connor asked. "Connor, you are your father's son. Yes, he is a champion. But so are you. You trained under your father to fight for the greater good. He has a muse, his redemption. Without it he wouldn't fight so hard. Your muse is this beautiful girl whose life is devoted to you. Her whole presence in this realm is to inspire you. Since you came back you've wanted something that is all yours. She is it," Cordelia said then left.

Connor slept uneasily. He woke up to find the muse in his room watching him sleep. "What are you doing?" Connor asked. "As if you have never watched someone you care about sleep?" she asked and he thought back to the night Cordy first came back. He'd stayed up all night just to protect her and watch her sleep.

"I know all things about you young Connor," she said. "Well I know nothing about you. Do you die? Do you love? What's your name?" he asked all at once. "I die as you do. I love only you and I am yours to name. Connor I exist only because you do. Think of me as a genie except I don't grant wishes. I help you find the will to fight."

"So I get to name you? How do I do that?" Connor asked. The muse answered, "let your eyes hold mine and inspiration will flow to you. Say the first name that comes to your mind." Connor locked eyes with his muse. They moved closer and closer until their lips met in a sweet kiss. She pulled away, "That is not a name Connor." He gazed into her eyes, "Kathleen" he said in a whisper, "that'll be your name." They kissed again. Love was their muse.

Angel woke up in the morning and decided to check on the muse. But she wasn't there. He woke up Cordy and they searched the hotel together. After a while everyone, Fred, Gunn, Lorne, Cordelia and Angel were looking. "Angel," Fred spoke up, "maybe it's time we wake Connor and see if maybe he knows where she is?" "Yeah but we can't all go up there. Remember he'll think we don't trust him. Let me go up alone," said Cordelia. She left up the stairs. Angel thought out loud sadly, "I wanted her to be a mother to Connor. Not a father, too."

Cordelia crept upstairs and made her way to Connor's door. She opened the door a crack and then a little more. She was surprised at the sight she saw. Connor and his muse were asleep in each other's arms. To her relief it was completely innocent. They were both fully dressed. Cordelia walked back downstairs. "The muse is fine. She's with Connor," Cordelia informed the group. "So why didn't they come down," Gunn asked. "They're sleeping. They slept together. Oh well not together together. But like actual sleep in an actual bed. With clothes on at all times," Cordy tried to explain. Angel made his way to the stairs. "Angel if you go up there mad you'll scare him away. You just got him back here. Do you really want to frighten him away?"

Upstairs the couple woke up at the same time. They were pleasantly surprised by the other's presence. They kissed good morning and then made their way down stairs hand in hand. When they got to the landing everyone stared at them. "Good morning," Connor said. "Good morning," everyone said in unison. "Hey um Miss Muse," Fred began uneasily, "would you like to see if some of my clothes fit you?" "Her name is Kathleen," Connor said. Fred grabbed Kathleen by the hand a led her up to Fred's room.

"Kathleen, interesting choice," Angel told his son. "Why?" Connor asked. Angel had read up on the meaning of names. After two hundred and some odd years you pretty much get around to reading a lot. He went on, "It means 'dear to my heart.' It's an old Celtic name." "Wow that's cool what does mine mean," Cordy asked. "Candid, sincere. It's Latin. Fred well Winifred means idealistic. Gunn, Charles means manly and Connor. Connor means high desire. It's of course Irish." "What does Angel mean?" Cordy asked. Everyone turned to look at her.

"Connor," Angel said and was going to continue with a lecture but Connor beat him to it. "Look, dad, I know she shouldn't have slept in my room. But I'm the only one she has. She was lonely. We only kissed twice last night and once this morning. It's only obvious that this will happen. In the past muses were lovers that inspired their mate. Well now she has inspired me first. Love will come with time when we are both ready. Now if you'd excuse me I'm going to get some breakfast," Connor said then left the room. Everyone was silent. "What do you mean only twice last night and once this morning? Connor," Angel called after him.

Kathleen watched from upstairs. Already she had inspired Connor to care for his father. Maybe good would triumph. "You had something to do with that," Fred asked. "Yes I did. Connor's battle is internal. I am here to inspire love and kindness towards his father. Connor and Angel are destined to be great champions. But only together will they triumph over evil. Therefore I was sent upon this realm by The Powers That Be. So as to assist the two warriors in achieving peace amongst themselves," explained Kathleen.

Fred was stunned. "And when they achieve peace?" she asked. A tear fell from the eye of the muse, "I shall transcend this realm and live in his heart and soul to inspire him further. I will lose my human form. For now I will love Connor and assist him in loving himself and his father."

A week had past and there were no signs of a battle. Angel was beginning to doubt this whole muse thing. It was the opposite of war. It was peace. Him and Connor had a newfound friendship. Connor would even talk to him about his growing feelings for Kathleen. It was like a family. The hotel became a home.

The muse, however, was becoming ill. Connor was worried. If he were sick he's take some Day-Quill and be all better. But she was a heavenly being from another realm. One morning Connor brought her breakfast in bed. "Oh Connor," she said weakly, "it is wonderful. I do not deserve such kindness. I have deceived you." Connor stared at her. "I told you I die as you die. However, that is incorrect. I die when your battle is over. But I don't die as humans do. I transcend this world. I will no longer be here but I'll be in your soul and heart so that you may always look to me to inspire you," Kathleen told Connor. "You're dying now. Aren't you," Connor asked. "Yes," the muse answered simply. "But I haven't fought yet. But my battle," Connor said with tears in his eyes.

"Your battle was not physical. Connor it was from within. You were fighting the demon of hatred. Hatred for your father. I've seen hatred grow to respect, respect to caring and once caring is love you will no longer need me," the muse explained. "Then I'll hate him forever," Connor yelled in tears. His hate for his father reemerged and gave Kathleen strength again.

Connor raced down the stairs. He grabbed a stake and went in search of this father. Connor found him in the lobby. Connor grabbed his father by the arm and spun his around and punched him in the face. They began to fight each other full force. Then the muse appeared magically between father and son. "Stop it Connor," the muse spoke. Unlike when she first appeared. She was now wearing all white. Connor got the stake and was about to stake his father.

But with great speed and strength the muse stopped Connor with a single hand. "Look at me Connor, my love. I no longer see hatred. You love your father. I know you love him," Kathleen told Connor. He broke down crying once more, "I do love you, Dad. I do. Kathleen has filled my heart with love and I'm ready to finally forgive you and love you." The father and son embraced each other.

There was a sweet smile from the muse as she faded away in a glittery haze. "Wait," Connor yelled. A faded echo voice filled the room, "Darling, Connor, the battle is won. Good has triumphed. I am here in your soul to inspire your goodness," she was gone.

"I love her dad," Connor said. Angel answered, "I know my son, I know." The father and son walked out of the lobby arms around each other. Father and son smiling with the muse of love in their hearts.

The End

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